2 posts tagged “school”

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some words.

May 9, 2008
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Laziness is the only excuse that I have for my lack of updates. Apologies. While I've been away I have been up to no good as usual. I chopped off all my hair [see photo] and have been obsessing over drawing and working on my new comix project - to be explained in detail soooooon. Work has been out of control lately,so I've taken it upon myself to do something that I never do and call out for the weekend, meaning today and tomorrow, and have a little stress-free fun with Mister Christopher! I've also been applying to art schools all over the place. I'm leaning toward Atlanta at the moment, but I'm questioning what I want to get out of it. Normally, I'd immediately say "animation" but there is absolutely no demand [meaning no work available] for animation majors. I'm thinking that I'll just have to feel my way through it once the time gets here. What is an aspiring comics genius to do? : ]

forget about your house of cards;

Jan 12, 2008
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Mister Christopher and Self

what a week. what a fucking week.

I started school Monday. My very first semester of college. It's such a weird feeling, going back after not being in school for two years. The feeling isn't uncomfortable exactly, maybe I just feel vulnerable. I'm not entirely sure. I feel alone in ways that I haven't in a very long time. Lonely at school is one small thing, but Mister Christopher left Wednesday. . .I barely kept it together. I slept on the ride to the airport, I didn't want to face it. I feel bad about not taking advantage of that time with him, but I didn't want to risk freaking out. I felt like I was in a tunnel the entire time we were at the airport, there was an aching build up and I almost lost it when he hugged me goodbye. I didn't want to let go. I didn't want to watch him walk away. I didn't want to let him go beyond that barrier, that invisible wall, at airports just past security. I held it together until that point, when I knew I couldn't walk up and hug him one more time. I'm glad Cindy was there. I cried on her, but continued to force it all back the best that I could. We waited until he was gone. Off the ground. I had the biggest coffee that I could find and downed it too fast, like it would make it all go away. It didn't, but it put me in a state to be around other people. I couldn't even sleep alone that night, so Cindy slept with me. I'm pathetic, I know. I didn't really freak out until school yesterday. He's gone. . . fuck. Then again at work. Really gone. . . fuck.He does seem happy to be back in Portland, so at least there is that. . .I was invited by some kids at school to go to a movie and have some booze tomorrow night. I'm going to take them up on their offer. I need to distract myself before I go mad. I fell back into my morning routine today, and it made me feel heavy. I had tea, listened to the new Radiohead, ate some cereal [Orangutan O's style. . . . .: / ] and started a new book. The weather is amazing outside. Amazing. I'm going to wear a shirt that isn't mine and leggings and go out to play.